Marky Mark's Interview... Continued

If you could do anything you wanted, what would you do for the greater 'good' of Mancunians.
You could probably call Singapore little Manchester because of all the 'football fans' Man Utd have recruited in this part of the world, thanks to their marketing. I can accept that they support a shit team, but what really pisses me off is how they know fuck all abt Man Utd. They don't even watch the games, all they do is find out how the team does through the tv highlights or from their mates. Therefore, if i could do anything i wanted....i would send them all to Manchester for a week so they actually realise that Manchester is 1.) actually a real place and 2.) has more city supporters than united fans.

If you were a girl, which liverpool player would you most want to sleep with?
Fernando Morientes. Has the whole spanish pretty boy look. Has played for Real Madrid, mates with Raul and so on...

For runner up id have to say Harry Kewell because hes got the looks too. (it doesnt matter thats hes shite because since when have girls actually cared about whats happening on the pitch)
Ill make my own category now : Which liverpool player would you least want to sleep with if you were a girl- Antonio Nunez- He looks like 1.) won't be able achieve an erection 2.) will come as soon as he achieves an erection.

Have you ever experienced any injury(ies) during a sexual encounter?
No Thank God, not yet at least. I do have a feeling that i will get a foreskin injury one day as mine is, shall we say, not as flexible as most. Im scared one day if the bird is drunk she may grab my knob and try to pull it back too far (ouch!), resulting in me waking up the whole neighbourhood.

What is the worst/best experience you have ever had whilst under the influence? (drink or drugs.)
Best expereince was probably with weed last summer at Niagara Falls, with my sis( she lives in Toronto). We smoked up behind the Casino hotel, in the carpark. Had a big scare halfway through doing it from a pipe, when a taxi came round a corner driving like a maniac. Of course when we were high, because of all the shiny stickers on the taxi and the sign on its roof, we thought it was a cop car.

So we both panicked and i threw the pipe under a parked car. How the hell was i suppose to know it was a bloody taxi! Anyways after that we went to the main street, where the density neon lights would seriously rival las vegas. That looked fukn amazing when high. We had timed our smoking early enough so that we could walk to the waterfall area in time to see the fireworks display. That was crazy too, it was like watching it in 3D.

After that was done we went to the huge Hershey's store nearby, and as you can imagine it was muchie heaven. Walk around a bit more before going into the arcade and being hopelessly bad at every game we tried, although table hockey was good (although you could only hit the puck once in three attempts). It always best to do weed when there are many things around you to do.

Worse experience would have to be on david's birthday when i seriously had too much to drink. Anyway i ended up being brought to clarke quay, this area in singapore next to the river. I had gone to the toilet but got hopelessly lost and ended up in a construction area. At one point i was crawling across some steel poles and i swear i looked down and saw water below me.

Thats when i freaked out...dont remember how i got out of the construction site but i eventually found my mates again and the next thing i remembered is being at home. I had woken up my mom when i came into the door. My fingers were fucked, elbows bleeding, all my clothes covered in mud, and as you can imagine my mom went psycho (was 17 then), and she was on my back for about 3 weeks after that little incident. Alcohol is bad.

What is the furthest you have ever inadvertently travelled whilst under the influence?
Not that far. I walked about 45 mins with an equally drunk mate to find an atm one night. We eventually found it and then took a cab back to the pub we were at before. In case you didnt know, Singapore is a fukn small island and everywhere is accessible within a 30 mins car ride. So you see, there isnt really anywhere i can go unless im drunk enough to try to swim somewhere.

Ever partaken in a sexual act outside. Were there witnesses?
No, unfortunately. I would love too though. However it might be a bit hard to do it here bacuse there aint any 'parks', as of such(the government prides itself on the policy of 'why have fukn trees when we can build x number of skyscrapers') Another problem is finding an Asian girl that would be willing to do such a thing. To get to a shagging stage, you'd probably have to meet her parents (every night for dinner for one year), meet her whole extended family from china, change your religion to hers, take dozens of photos in those '2 minute instant photo machines', SMS her every 15 mins and buy her a one of those bullshit Japanese 'Hello Kitty' dolls. As you can see, the pain exceeds the pleasure.

What is your favourite album for entertaining? (you know what I mean)
Haven't really done that, but when a bird was at my house she was usuing my computer and put on U2 (Achtung Baby i think)...so maybe i should do that if it happens again. However i once put on 'Fear of the dark' by Iron Maiden, and i got told, and ill quote this "Ewww, i hate that music it makes my head hurt". Stupid cow, no one is allowed to diss Iron Maiden.